Training a submissive on line:  I have a great many strongly held beliefs as far as this goes.

To be very straight forward, I question the point of on line training.  Certainly, I can give directions, tasks, lessons, and or demand and describe punishments on line.  A submissive can do them, or tell me they have done them, and we can live that way in our fantasies, but in my opinion, fantasy is what it would be.

Even if a submissive religiously follows all my directives, how would that be rewarding to me other than knowing that I am told, and believe, that someone somewhere has followed my directions?

I am a real time, face to face person.  What rewards me is admiration, respect, love, high sexual passion and a profound willingness to do as I direct coming from that respect and admiration.  I want to SEE the changes in your face, hear the expression in your voice, feel your head as you kneel and lay it upon my lap.  I want to feel your lips on my cock and watch you struggle to take it completely down your throat as I push your head down.  Real time, face to…ah, well….

Now, how I would train.  It is a process.  That process begins by talking, getting to know one another as respected and valued human beings.  BOTH of us, respected and valued.  We talk and discuss what it is we want out of this relationship, what it is that excites us, where we want to go in life, what we can offer the other in ALL areas of life, not limited to sexual or D/s in any way.  We see if there are things that excite us about the other and if we feel comfortable.  Do I like the sound of your voice?  Do you touch comfortingly?  Do I feel safe with you?  Do you pay attention?  Do YOU want to structure how you submit or do you accept my Dominance?  Many MANY things come into play here.  And this is just to find out if we get along.

Then, slowly, small item by small item, I would request that you do things.  I might ask you to address me in a particular way, or do some small thing whenever we meet or talk, and I would watch closely to see if you would follow through.  I would tell you what it is I wanted, I would give you the opportunity to ask any question you desire so you are confident you understand, and then I would ask if you would be willing to do what it is I asked.  If so, I would expect it to be done.  If you could not consistently do a small task, there is little point in going forward.

I would watch for respect.  I would watch particularly to see that you asked questions, communicated as openly as possible, and expressed any and all concerns you might have.  Communication is overwhelmingly necessary and if there are problems there, the relationship will struggle until they are solved, or it will end.

Structures and tasks would increase, and I would wish to hear, consistently, what kind of tasks YOU desire, doing what kind of things rewards YOU.  I would need some strong introspection and self understanding.  No matter how honorable, communicative, and trustworthy any two people are, that does not guarantee they are a good match.  This is a period of exploration.

Eventually, if all goes well, and we both wish it, I would ask if you desire and are ready for some level of commitment.  We will then discuss IN DETAIL what that commitment means, what it comprises, and what it requires of each of us.

Does this sound like training?  All I have asked is a limited number of small tasks.  Yet I have spent the entire time doing my best to get to know you, and showing you in detail who I am, what is important to me.  You are under no obligation.  You may leave at any time, and if you feel any discomfort, I wish you would.  There is little point in denying your desires and needs because you want something you do not have.

Is this possible on line?  I do not believe that beyond a fantasy level, I can get the kinds of rewards I need from a relationship that is not face to face.  I can teach.  I can express my opinion, as I do here.  But training is a mutually rewarding experience.  It should be profoundly supportive and confirming to both parties.  For me, and I repeat that, for me, attempting that purely through textual messaging, is not possible.

The Eroticist