So, here we are, this fuzzy conglomerate of matter and action, all throbbing to vibrations we are only beginning to understand.  Possibly even that understanding is beyond our possibilities.  But the questions are being asked.

All I am struggling with are possibilities, things that might be.  The conclusions I draw here have consequences in my life and I have to make the decision as to whether or not they are benificial to me or not.  So far, the questions are stimulating.

What if *I* am more than *I*?  What if my “concepts” of reality do, in fact, create the reality I experience, not in a judgmental opinion form, but in a material creation form?  What kind of Wizard does that make me?  Can I, through my thought, change the form of the reality I experience?  Can I create a feather?

There have been attempts and experiments innumerable and truly, if there were any number of  replicable results showing the repeatable manipulation of material through mental effort alone, Wolf Blitzer would be there to tell us about them, cause CNN knows all the answers.  So the question is, are we asking the right questions?

I know there are many things I want to be, to happen, to have.  I can wish, and hope, and dream upon first light of a star, with a coin in a well, and Jiminy Cricket not withstanding, we all pretty well know the reality of that.  But wanting what we do not have has a strange contrary nature to it.  Within that desire is the confirmation that we don’t have it.  So the thought says, “I don’t have this and I want it.”  What I am coming to believe is that wanting something in that way in fact confirms the state, “I don’t have this and I want it.”  The conundrum of desire.  Is it possible that wanting what I do not have can work against having it, that opposites do not attract?  Is this True?  I do not know.  But for a while I am going to see what happens in my life if I believe it.

So what do I wish for?  What do I do?  I think it starts with believing you are worthy, saying “This is who I am.  What I want is mine already.  It may not be delivered, but it is mine and it is coming.  I am worthy of it.”  Where have we heard, “Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you”?  [Mathew 7:7]  Well, that takes faith, don’t it?  Coming so strongly from a religious context we all seem to think that verse has to be involved with the stereotypical (or, God help us, the fundamental) “Christian” ideal.  Perhaps it is just a hint into the way the universe works.

So where have I wandered in this morass of pointless thought?  Quantum physics tells us that matter and energy are integrally connected with observation and thought, that thought on some indeterminate level is creation.  Experiments have shown that all things are connected in an almost inconceivably basic way.  The “me” that observes and the “world” that is observed are not separate and unique identities and the act of observation and interpretation is also manipulation.  From the comments on some of my links there is obviously a debate of varying intelligence.  This entire mental exercise may be nothing but a fools dream.

What I do believe is that choice is far more of an active force in our lives that we tend to accept.  I do not mean only choice of action, but more importantly, choice of belief.  At this point in my life I choose to believe that my faith and thoughts, my acceptance that those material things, relationships and experiences of which I believe I am worthy will come to me.  I choose to believe that is in my power.

And with great joy, I confirm that I am a unique, perverse, intelligent, respectful, Dominant of creative and somewhat sadistic sexual tendencies who chooses to find the erotic of all forms in his life, and with care, concern, trust and reverence, wishes to share that with those who enjoy.  I am what I create and I seek to do that with gratitude and joy.

The Eroticist

Thoughts to pursue:  Schrödinger’s cat, The Measurement Problem and more from Wikipedia, Reality as an Illusion, and The Observer Effect.